How do you desire to feel? Centered, nourishing, blissful, generous, ecstatic, radiant, accomplished, playful, held, fierce, tranquil…?
Now ask yourself: What goals do you have?
If these goals do not align with how you want to feel, it is likely that you have formulated your goals backwards.
My Qigong teacher, Joyce Virani, introduced me to a book by Danielle LaPorte called “The Desire Map”. This book opened my eyes to an interesting concept: We often create our goals before tuning into how we desire to feel first. And when we do this, we are deprived of ever feeling satisfied and accomplished. After realizing I was guilty of doing so, I took the first step to remedy this issue by figuring out my core desired feelings.
Your core desired feelings are about 5 or so words which describe how you truly wish to feel. Before you make a goal or checklist, consult with these feelings first. Ask yourself: How do you want to feel when you wake up in the morning? When you walk into a room? When you are in a circle of friends? When you leave your workplace? When you are alone?
Consider these questions. Be honest with yourself. Then write down whatever words come up for you, without judgement. It is these feelings that surface which should become your driving force, the root of the decisions you make, the reasons for the goals you create. Personally, I want to feel invigorated. Magnetic. Limitless. Sensual. Liberated. And so on.
With these feelings manifested, decisions should be clear and easy. Little or big changes to your lifestyle may be made. Perhaps, if you want to feel soft and angelic, all you need is to buy silk fabrics or wear light pink blush. But of course drastic changes may be made from this process. If you desire to feel nurturing, maybe adopt a pet. If you want to feel alive, maybe your 9-5 desk job is no longer for you. Tune into your feelings, and then plan and execute accordingly.
Hopefully this process helps you to feel more connected to your passions. Revisit your words from time to time. Just like a list of goals, check in to see whether you have achieved certain feelings or not. Keeping up with prioritizing your core desired feelings will aid you in leading a more clear-headed and fulfilled lifestyle~